Negotiating with your kids is the best way to avoid power struggles and to “figure it out”, whatever “it” is. It’s coming to an agreement rather than getting involved in an argument, it’s working together as parent and child to negotiate issues that come up.
Power struggles happen in every home. I’ve known great parents who still get into occasional power struggles with their kids. Good negotiation skills can help eliminate those power struggles when you use these negotiating hints…
One of the best ways to reduce power struggles with your kids is to learn the art of negotiating with them.
There are many moments in the first twelve years of your kids’ lives when you can prevent them from making poor choices. At the very least, it is possible to negotiate successful alternative with them and avoid power struggles. To accomplish such negotiation and to decrease power struggles in your home, you need tools – most importantly, the power of negotiation. Part 2
As the adult in the home, more often than not, creating peace in your home is up to you, so I hope these few ideas will find a useful place in your “toolbox”, and your home will be a place of strong relationships, a place of learning and a place where children thrive.
Maintaining peace in your home creates a positive environment where children feel secure and loved, and where family values can be taught and strong relationships built. Use these tools to help you build and maintain a peaceful home.
These are tools and secrets that behaviorists have used for years to maintain positive behaviors. These tools and strategies will help you maintain and continue to foster good choices by your kids. On many occasions, your kids make good decisions, behave well, comply with your request, and simply put – do the right thing! Unfortunately, it’s often when kids misbehave that we notice them.
You have been helping your kids communicated, identify their feelings, and face their fears. Not to mention helping them learn to manage stress and frustration. You’re doing well, until…one day they catch you “losing it!” They overhear you curse and react toward someone in an unfair manner. Now what?
Privileges should be desirable to the kid…In order for you to have any leverage when using privileges as incentive for reward, you must make sure the privilege is something your child wants. So, while I’ve provided suggestions for age appropriate privileges, the best way to find out what you kids consider rewarding
As you’re mastering the art of motivating your kids, it’s important to avoid falling back into old habits. In my experience, sometimes while parents are learning how to create a more motivated and grateful child, they may confuse bribing with using incentives. Let’s focus on specific ways you can differentiate between bribes, threats and incentives.
In all the years I provided training for families, I would often ask kids, “If you had a magic want and you could change one thing about your parents, what would it be?” or ” If you had a magic wand and could make your parents do whatever you wanted, what would it be?” Almost consistently, they have told me they would make their parents listen to them and hear the better.
